Building a circle of support is one of the most valuable and worthwhile things you can do in your motherhood journey.
It doesn’t matter if you are newly pregnant or a mother of older children you can start now, and it doesn’t have to be an overwhelming task – just start simple.
Create one friendship and build that up and then create another- remember friendships are created over time and grow slowly. When you meet someone who is genuine, kind and share the same interests, values or anything that makes you light up be sure to nurture that relationship!
You may already have some wonderful people in your circle that you just need to allow the space to come in and support you.
Here are some of my top tips for creating a circle of support to carry you through motherhood.
Neighbours are handy
Start with getting to know your neighbours. They can be a great support system and the best thing is that they are right next door!
You may have someone in your street who is also a new mother, or pregnant, or someone that is a grandmother who is home all the time and you can pop over for a cup of tea and chat.
Recently my next-door neighbour popped over for a few nappies as she had run out! That is the beauty of having a village (especially right next door).
Mothers groups are a great starting point
Mothers groups are great place to find and connect with other women who going through the same thing as you – which can create an instant connection due to similar challenges, struggles and just being able to “get it”.
Some places where you find mothers groups are -
- Online groups – handy and easy to connect
- Local Mothers groups – usually run by your local community hub
- Prenatal Classes – yoga, hypnobirthing, calmbirth & postpartum classes are a great place to start!
Get comfortable with being vulnerable
Motherhood is all about embracing being vulnerable. You need to grow so much as a person to keep up with Motherhood as she will just keep pushing you into vulnerable situations.
You may as well embrace it and surrender to the process and allow yourself to be open to let people in.
I understand how challenging this can be, to be open and honest and to allow others to see your true self – but this is a great way to make a long-lasting friendship that you can be comfortable and vulnerable in for years to come.
Paid support can be a lifesaver!
Perhaps you had never even considered paid support as part of your overall circle of support! I absolutely love having amazing people in my circle who I can rely on regardless of whether I pay them or not.
They are all so valuable and make my life as a mother so much easier. Think about regular babysitters, or childcare like family day care or an amazing cleaner to help you keep on top of things.
Ask for help and accept it
One of the biggest things that many mothers are not so great at doing is asking for help and accepting it! The whole point in a circle of support is support, so you need to allow those people to support you in any way that they offer, and you feel comfortable accepting.
Make sure you check in with yourself and really work on your mindset. Often, we can refuse support because we don’t want to allow ourselves to be vulnerable and open.
But there is so much beauty in allowing this process to happen and you will absolutely thrive from receiving the support you need and deserve!
Building a circle of support isn’t always easy but it well worth the effort you put in now for your motherhood journey in the long run.
You are worthy of the support, friendship and connections.
YOU HAVE GOT THIS!
ABOUT OUR CONTRIBUTOR:
Ashley believes that when a baby is born so is a mother. She is the creator of Divine Motherhood
Retreat, an online membership area supporting women to be the mum they want to be.
You can find many motherhood resources and support on her website www.themotherhoodcircle.com.au